1 Introductory Remarks

When living in a Buddhist nunnery in China, it is hard to ignore the hegemonic Buddhist gender discourse as reflected by the nuns*¹ and female lay practitioners themselves. Many leave traditional gender perceptions entirely unquestioned and consider them part of the natural order, the product of karmic conditions. For instance, laywomen often point to the suffering and karmic hindrances (yezhang 業障) of females (regarding the female disposition and inability to become a Buddha), while highly-educated nuns*² usually mention women’s bad habits (xiqi maobing 習氣毛病), weaknesses of character that must be improved. Furthermore, many female lay believers refer to themselves as “being the earth” in contrast to their husbands “being heaven,” which legitimizes their subordination to men. However, while the laywomen I talked with tended to accept their fate as women who cannot avoid suffering (as expressed in the pain of menstruation or family ties), nuns* regard themselves as having transcended the narrow restrictions of their female identity. This entails transforming into a dazhangfu 大丈夫, a masculine hero, as a means of self-empowerment.

In order to succeed on this path, one must first learn confidence (xinxin 信心), including confidence in one’s own ability. Therefore, nuns* often understand xinxin from the perspective of modern Chinese, in which xinxin means “confidence” rather than the traditional Buddhist meaning of a faithful or believing mind. However, in other contexts within my study, xinxin is also associated with faith.

In this study I will focus on the gender-related aspects of xinxin, i.e., its relation to the topic of transitioning towards a masculine hero, since this is very distinctive of the discourse on confidence among nuns*. Of course, the goal of becoming a dazhangfu is by no means only a women’s issue; it carries great weight for the monks as well. The Pure Land’s path—with its emphasis on devout faith—thus also includes friaries, since it is the most widespread cultivation method within Buddhism in mainland China. For nuns*, however, xinxin has a very specific layer of meaning that endows it with great importance. Part of this importance is the nexus of the religious and everyday, mundane meanings of xinxin, ranging from devout Buddhist faith to self- confidence as a worldly concept.

In the present analysis I do not focus on the full range of linguistic understandings of the term xinxin as part of so-called “written Buddhist high culture.” Instead, I am interested in discovering what xinxin means to present-day Buddhist nuns* in China as part of their lived realities. Which aspects of xinxin seem most meaningful to them on a personal level, and why? Consequently, I will not only concentrate on the terms that are directly mentioned, but also employ a grounded theory approach to compress the respective messages contained in the various statements into condensed concepts.

This analysis is based on ethnographic data I collected in a large Buddhist convent³ in central China between 2014 and 2015. My study was part of a larger field research project that aimed to investigate how nuns* in contemporary China participate in the discourse on the future of mainland Chinese Buddhism. For this project I engaged in participant observation and conducted eight biographical interviews (of at least two hours each) with Buddhist nuns*, as well as two guideline-based interviews with the abbess* and with the second-most important (female) master within the temple hierarchy. I coded the interviews as well as my notes from observing the participants using a grounded theory approach as well as by means of variables I also used for the discourse analysis.

For this discourse analysis I take as my starting point the hegemonic discourse theory of Ernesto Laclau and Chantal Mouffe. According to this theory, meaning becomes temporarily manifest in chains of signifiers that are equivalent to each other, and it is these chains of equivalent signifiers that determine an allegedly objective reality.⁴ At the same time, antagonist concepts are juxtaposed in a row of negative equivalents.⁵ For instance, within the hegemonic Chinese Buddhist gender discourse, one can filter out all kinds of positive character traits of men in a chain of equivalent concepts. This is juxtaposed by a contrasting line of terms describing the weaknesses of women, which could be understood as a process of othering.

The nunnery in which I conducted my research is one of China’s largest. It maintains tight connections with the Pushou monastery on Mount Wutai, which is currently China’s most eminent and influential convent. Functioning in some way as an elite temple similar to Pushou Temple, it stresses not only the importance of erudition but also the strict observance of monastic rules typical of the Vinaya school (lüzong 律宗).⁶ The emphasis on monastic rules also includes maintaining a frugal lifestyle in poverty and preventing the monastery from becoming commercialized. Because of this, the nunnery enjoys a good reputation and therefore attracts numerous laypeople who leave generous donations. These donations are not spent on improving the living conditions of the nuns* or temple leaders, but are used instead to reconstruct the temple buildings, most of which were damaged during the Cultural Revolution. As for the methods of self-cultivation, the abbess* propagates Pure Land, Chan, and Tiantai Buddhism. The temple leaders also strongly value providing a higher education for nuns* in order to train outstanding Dharma teachers. They have established a Buddhist academy within the temple compound for this purpose. Overall, the temple leaders see their main tasks as (1) improving the nuns’* educational situation and (2) preserving Buddhist orthodoxy (zhengfa 正法) by strictly observing monastic discipline. This includes abiding by all of the 348 precepts for nuns* (nearly 100 more than those for monks) as well as implementing the morning and evening rites in full length and complying with the etiquette of monastic life. Preserving orthodoxy also means devoutly following the Gurudharma or Eight Principal Rules (bajingfa 八敬法), which subordinates the nuns* to the monks by formally putting them under their control. On a day-to-day basis, however, the nuns* have little to do with monks and run their nunnery independently. In line with Pushou Temple, what makes the convent very distinctive is the “self-confident” combination of erudition and devout faith. While this attitude may also apply to some monks’ temples, it is nonetheless very remarkable considering the widespread notion that Pure Land’s practice is most suited to uneducated female practitioners.

2 Traditional Buddhist Understandings of Femininity and Gender Transition

Traditional Han Buddhist images of women as well as the idea of becoming a masculine hero in order to transcend gender boundaries are very well explored within the research on Buddhist nuns* in Taiwan. For instance, Hillary Crane has provided important reflections on this topic, although many other authors could also be mentioned.⁷ As for historical studies of mainland China, Beata Grant and Miriam Levering have made essential contributions to exploring the rhetoric on Buddhist nuns* who have become dazhangfu.⁸ The situation in contemporary mainland China is less well documented. Qin Wenjie’s PhD thesis from Harvard University is an exception; Qin conducted in-depth field research in a nunnery on Mount Emei in Sichuan in the late 1990s.⁹ Other recent articles on Buddhist nuns* in mainland China do not focus explicitly on gender identities.

According to the research results of Buddhist gender discourse in Taiwan, women are considered to be essentially weak and are ascribed typically negative character traits; these include being emotional, narrow-minded, dependent, inconstant, petty, timid, vain, and greedy by nature. Moreover, traditional Buddhist ways of thinking dictate that women are impure, seductive, and threatening for the monks. Traditional Han gender ideologies imply that women tend to be jealous, chatty, and weak, ascriptions that still apply to current Han Buddhism.¹⁰ Ancient Indian Buddhist tradition holds that the feminine body is bound by the Five Hindrances (wuzhang 五障), and that a woman therefore cannot be reborn as a Brahmā god, an Indra god, a Māra god, a wise Cakravartin king, or a Buddha.¹¹ The imperfect and impure female body is contrasted with the 32 marks (lakṣaṇa) of a Buddha or wise king, which include a retractable penis.¹² Mahayana Buddhism, on the other hand, gives contradictory answers to the question of whether a woman can become a Buddha within her female body. Many Sūtras claim that a female must physically transition to a man before becoming a Buddha, while others affirm that she does not.¹³

Nuns* are not completely restricted to these negative perceptions of the female gender, however. Instead, they have the opportunity to become a “masculine hero with noble qualities” (dazhangfu 大丈夫), although this is considered to be more difficult for them than for monks. According to Levering¹⁴ and Grant,¹⁵ the term dazhangfu, which can be traced back to Mengzi, has always been highly gender-connoted, as it refers to the masculine virtues and talents:

… be these heroic valor, extraordinary literary talent, or, in the case of Chan Buddhism [in the Song dynasty], a strong and immovable determination to overcome any obstacle to the attainment of realization.¹⁶

The term dazhangfu clearly has gender connotations in the Buddhist discourse of contemporary mainland China. Although both men and women can become a dazhangfu, the term is constructed as the very opposite of a typical woman, who is seen as limited by weakness, timidity, and narrow-mindedness. I will discuss the gender-specific attributes of the figure of the dazhangfu in more detail in the next section.

The highly-educated nuns* in the temple in which I conducted my research claim that, since the Buddha-nature is neither male nor female, enlightenment can certainly be attained within a female body (nüshen 女身). However, from my interviews it became apparent that, to become a Buddha, a nun* has to transition to a man-like form, a dazhangfuxiang 大丈夫相, in order to transcend the restrictions of her* female identity, an identity that comprises her* character, manner, habits, and appearance. It is important to note here that Buddhist discourse on gender transition in China contains a crucial difference of opinion. Some female* Buddhists believe that transitioning to a dazhangfu also impacts the body, which is in some cases manifested through bringing one’s menstruation to a halt. Thus, a highly-educated nun* told me once that if women want to attain Buddhahood, they must first take on the form of a dazhangfu, which refers not only to the character but also to the body. She claimed that a woman has to adapt to the masculine body structure, and that she* has reached a higher grade of cultivation if she succeeds. If she* has entirely transformed into a man, she* can even leave the nuns*’ order and enter the monks’ order; however, such incidents have been very rare. Her* view is supported by the Buddhist understanding of the body as being driven by karma and therefore changeable. Furthermore, it draws on the traditional Buddhist discourse on sex transition contained in many Sūtras and embodied in the dragon princess of the Lotus Sūtra, who is the most prominent role model for contemporary Chinese Buddhist nuns*. Official Buddhist gender discourse, however, flatly denies the notion of a biological transition. For instance, the influential monk Minghai 明海 argues that the ideal of the female-to-male-transition (zhuannü chengnan 轉女成男) should not be understood as a physical process.¹⁷ I also discussed this topic with a highly-educated nun* of another monastery, and it turned out that although she* was aware of the discourse on bodily transitions through self-cultivation, she* decisively preferred the interpretation that the adaption process towards a man only concerned one’s bad habits (xiqi maobing 習氣毛病) and temperament (qizhi 氣質). Accordingly, she* vehemently rejected the idea of a substantial sex change. Since this view is in contrast to all of the Sūtras describing physical transitions, it might perhaps reflect the influence of Western modern discourses about the physical body. At the same time, the idea of physical transitions still exists in mainland China, being part of an unofficial, informal popular sub-discourse. In line with this, it is hard to deny that nuns’* practice of tying their breasts in order to make them invisible has a bodily dimension: it displays a self-demarcation away from the sexualization of the female body and towards androgyny.¹⁸ From these difference conceptions it is clear that, firstly, gender transition is an ongoing, fluid process, and secondly, that gender identities are not one-sided, but multi-layered.

As Levering has pointed out, Mahayana Buddhism (and in the past particularly Chan Buddhism) has rhetorically always more or less stressed equality between men and women.¹⁹ However, as the abbess* of the nunnery explained to me, one should consider that two different realms exist for Buddhists. One is the prajñā (bore 般若) realm, in which there is no difference between men and women, enlightenment and delusion, and so on. In this realm there seems to be no difference between a nun* becoming a Buddha within her* female* body or transitioning entirely to become a man. According to the abbess*, the other realm is the present world (suopo shijie 娑婆世界), in which differences between men and women still exist. In this realm, nuns* (who are born into a female body) must observe all 348 precepts in order to overcome their karmic hindrances.

3 Becoming a “Masculine Hero” through xinxin 信心 (Confidence)

As mentioned above, xinxin 信心 has many connotations within contemporary mainland Chinese Buddhist discourse, and these connotations are exactly the same for both monks and nuns*. However, when analyzing the transcripts of my interviews with the nuns*, I noticed that xinxin is sometimes linked with the concept of a dazhangfu, a masculine hero, which indicates a gender-related perspective. For instance, when I asked the novice “Af” what dazhangfu means for her*, she* replied:

Af: Dazhangfu has many meanings. For instance, it is a form of address for a male. But another meaning refers to, um, for example, men who are very resolute, have strong willpower, high ambitions, and a strong sense of social responsibility. And strong willpower. And strong confidence (you hen qiang de xinxin 有很強的信心). When they are faced with difficulties, they don’t back down. […] To become a monastic means to be a dazhangfu. […] It is actually very powerful and very difficult to let go (fangxia 放下) of everything. But monastics can manage what is difficult to manage; they can bear what is hard to bear. It’s not only that we no longer cling to the material environment, that we eat very poorly, that our living conditions are very hard; well, it is hard, but what is difficult to bear, we should bear. But we should also change our bad habits. What is difficult to change, we should change. […] Anyway, I’m actually just a little girl, I’m just a little girl.

I: You’re very modest.

Af: Yes. (laughing) I’m a little girl. I haven’t faced any great storms of life yet. Our abbess* and our other master, they have experienced a lot. But on the surface they are always very peaceful. No matter how much hardship they have gone through, when they face other people, they always have a smile on their lips, gently and tranquilly.

Af: 丈夫的話，就是有很多種含義。它就是說(吸氣)，嗯，一種是對於男性的一種稱呼叫丈夫。但是另外一種嗯，含義的話就是因為比如說有很多男性他很有堅堅(sic!)，他意志力很强。然後有高遠的志向。然後有很强的社會責任感。然後有很强的意志力。有很強的信心。可以遇到困難之後不退縮。[…] 那說出家是大丈夫。[…] 放下這個力量，其實很强大但是很難。那出家人就是難行能行，難忍能忍。不光是說對外界的這個物質條件上我們淡泊，吃得很差，生活的環境很差。呃這個是很難的。難忍的要忍。還有是對於自己的毛病習氣，難改的要改。[…] (吸氣) 但是現在其實(own name) 還只是一個小娃娃。還是個小娃娃.

I: 太謙虛.

Af: 是。(笑) 還是個小娃娃。真正的還沒經歷過什麼大風大浪。像真正像和[ 尚啊，像(name of the abbess*)，像我们和尚呃，(name of another female* master) 啊。那會經歷很多很多。但是你從表面上看的話一直很平靜，不管他們經歷過多少的苦難，但是當面對人的時候永遠是面帶微笑的，是祥和寧靜的. (Af 2, 07:16–10:41)

Here, the term xinxin is linked with having strong willpower, determination, persistence, high ambitions, and a wide-ranging social responsibility as well as with being resolute and indifferent when facing hardship; it is linked with the masculine character traits of a dazhangfu and therefore highly gender-connoted. In contrast to this image of a dazhangfu, the novice refers to herself* as a “little girl.” In the context of the interview, I think she* intended to express her* humbleness in relation to the abbess* as a demonstration of modesty in my presence. At the same time, the nun* highlighted that all monastics (both monks and nuns*) must take the path of a dazhangfu. According to her*, it is very difficult and challenging to become a monk or nun*. However, a dazhangfu is willing and able to cope with any hardship.

The nun* and I also talked about the difficulties women face in asserting themselves within the Buddhist community or even at university. For instance, the nun* (who had obtained a PhD from an elite university in China and had worked as a lecturer) advised me to never give up when pursuing a goal, no matter how difficult it was going to be:

Af: You know, Johanna, you need very firm (jianding 堅定) confidence (xinxin 信心) and a goal to pursue! Actually, very often we should not blame the external environment when we cannot accomplish something, but we should see the reason as being a lack of confidence (xinxin 信心) and willpower (yizhili 意志力) within ourselves. Confidence and willpower (xinxin gen yizhili 信心跟意志力). When we are confronted with difficulties, when we get nowhere and virtually no longer proceed, when we simply have no idea how to overcome a problem—that is when most people actually decide to give up, give up and say, well, that’s the way things are. I can’t achieve my objective anyway, so let’s do something else. Many people are like that, but actually it’s a weakness of women, yeah, women would easily give up and say, never mind, let’s do something else, I don’t care. That’s how they console themselves. But a Buddha or Bodhisattva with the power of vowing (yuanli 願力) … let’s talk about the power of vowing, in order to be able to become a Buddha or Bodhisattva … he would tell his followers, no matter what you’re doing, what really matters is your strong power of mind. With his willpower he can accomplish anything, accomplish anything. No matter what kind of hardship he faces, he will—even if there’s only one person left [who has not become a Buddha yet]—he will persist until the very end [i.e., until everyone has become a Buddha].

Af: 嗯其實對約涵老師，也是可以要有這個堅定的這個信心跟目標了(sic!)，其實嗯，有時候了，更多的說這個事情能不能做成不在外界。就在於說自己的信心跟這個意志力。信心跟意志力。當我們遇到困難，走不動的時候，沒辦法前行，不知道怎麼解决的時候，其實更多的人選擇的是放弃，放弃覺得哎呀，就這樣吧，我達不到了那我就做別的去吧，因為很多的人是這樣放棄，這其實也是女性的一個弱點，對，她就會放弃說哎算了，我做我做其他的吧，做啥都一樣。就自我安慰。但嗯真正的一個就是說願力了，我們講願力，佛菩薩，他之所以能够成為佛菩薩，他跟他的眾生來說，其實做的事情都是一樣的，不一樣的就是在於他們有這個大的心力，有這個意志力能够走到底，能够走到底。不管遇到多少困難，我們講說，乃-乃至，哪怕說只剩下最後一個人了，他還要堅持. (Af 2, 49:42–51:05)

In this passage it is clear that the nun* is struggling with a perceived gender-related inequality of opportunities, one that she* does not interpret as being socially constructed but as stemming from karmic conditions. The solution is to cultivate xinxin 信心, namely confidence, which is linked with yizhili 意志力, i.e., willpower. However, she* also points to the importance of staying persistent and resolute when pursuing an objective, something a Bodhisattva (in contrast to most women) is very skilled at.

The term yizhili 意志力 (willpower) derives from modern discourses and is closely connected with the policy and ideology of Mao Zedong.²⁰ On the one hand, drawing on and incorporating concepts from other discourses (e.g., Confucianism) is nothing new in Chinese Buddhism. On the other hand, there were probably equivalent expressions in traditional Chinese. For instance, Soothill and Hodous explain the expression zhangfuzhigan 丈夫志幹 as a “firm-willed man, especially used of a bodhisattva who dauntlessly presses forward.”²¹ According to Pi Chaogang, Song-dynasty Chan patriarch Dahui Zonggao 大慧宗杲 (1089–1163) referred to a “determined will” (juedingzhi 决定志) that is closely connected with faith (xin 信).²² Even more enlightening is another story about Dahui Zonggao, who said to one of his female disciples: “Even though you are a woman, you have the will of a ta-chang-fu [dazhangfu].”²³ In line with this, Levering repeatedly connects the notion of dazhangfu with a burning or strong will, which stands in opposition to typical femaleness.²⁴ The Yuanwu foguo chanshi yulu, Levering’s most important primary source, includes expressions that can be read as being equivalent to yizhili 意志力 (willpower), such as yongmeng fenzhi 勇猛奮志 (“a fierce, violent, and striving will”) and juelie zhiqi 決烈志氣 (“a determined and fiery will”).²⁵ Whereas it is beyond the scope of this chapter to validate this research result from a historical perspective, I nevertheless refer to these references to suggest that the idea of a strong-willed dazhangfu embedded in a gender context is anything but new.

In line with this, combining willpower with xinxin and dazhangfu takes on a distinctly important meaning for nuns* in contemporary China who are concerned with transitioning their gender. This is all the more so because the ideal of willpower and confidence is contrasted with the “weak nature” of women who “easily give up.” From the viewpoint of Chinese Buddhists, this is not due to outer social circumstances, but has inner reasons connected with one’s nature. Therefore, learning xinxin and demonstrating willpower is regarded as the only way of changing one’s situation in life.

The notion of “vowing” is also worth mentioning. In the discussion above, the novice refers to a Bodhisattva with the power of vowing and persistence who works hard and tirelessly to bring all living beings on the path to Buddhahood. Here, “vowing” (yuan 願) stems from a Pure Land background, i.e., “believing, vowing, and practicing” (xin yuan xing 信願行). Xinxin is closely linked with these three concepts, with one layer of meaning slipping into the others, as can be seen in the following interview with another (fully ordained) nun*:

Ef: But if you keep on practicing continuously, then everything will be all right. Continuously, you know. Staying confident and steadfast in yourself (xinxin jianding ziji 信心堅定自己), then you will overcome, overcome all troubles and straits and finally reach the other shore. You need firm confidence (jianding de xinxin 堅定的信心). Only if you have faith (xin 信) will you finally come to an end one day. If your confidence is not strong enough, then you should goad yourself day by day. Um, I believe, firm confidence is very important. “Believing, vowing, practicing” (xin yuan xing 信願行). When you have faith (xin 信), you will make a vow and finally start to practice. “Believing, vowing, practicing” is a good guidance for your, um, self-cultivation.

Ef: 但是如果是橫(sic!) 的這樣下去，那就好，橫(sic!) 的就是，信心堅定自己，一定會會過去。會過去那些溝溝坎坎，直達彼岸，要有堅定的信心，有信才會有-有-有到頭的這一天，如果信心都不足的話，每天給自己要加油。嗯，信心堅定這是我覺得是很重要的。信願行嘛。有信嘛然後再發願然後再去實行。信願行來-來指導自己，嗯，去修行. (Ef 1:24:31–1:25:09)

For this nun*, faith is the very foundation of vowing and practicing; it is always the starting point. However, what she* particularly stresses here is the combination of xinxin with “steadfastness” (jianding 堅定) in a row of equivalent signifiers, notably with being steadfast in oneself. One can therefore conclude that “steadfastness,” like willpower, carries a special significance for her*, as it indicates gender transition and is therefore important for her* life.

Also remarkable here is the implicit connection of xinxin with “self-confidence,” i.e., being confident that one is able to attain enlightenment one day, something which is essential for the nuns*’ self-identity as dazhangfu. However, the term zixin 自信 (self-confidence) is not explicitly used, perhaps because it is closely linked with the Western understanding of being confident in one’s individual self, whereas Buddhism denies the existence of an individual essence of personality. Instead, what is emphasized here is confidence in oneself being able to become a Buddha, because everyone possesses the one true nature (zixing 自性) irrespective of their individual personality and characteristics.

The expression zixin, however, is by no means only used in a modern Western sense, as Meisterernst has quoted for early Buddhist texts within this volume (“… zixin zuofo 自信作佛”). In regard to the chapter on Yiguandao within this book, Broy mentions the emphasis on “believing in one’s own true self” (zixin 自信) as an essential attribute of xinxin, a concept which refers to Buddhist traditions. Huang Weishan, another contributor of this volume, highlights that the term “self-confidence” (zixin 自信) plays a certain role within the current movement in mainland China of the Taiwanese Ciji foundation, a Buddhist welfare organization led by the nun* Zhengyan but grounded in the voluntary work of Buddhist laypeople. According to Huang, the nun* Zhengyan even explicitly highlighted the importance of self-confidence in relation to faith in one of her* historical statements. In line with this, one of Huang’s interlocutors said that Zhengyan had stated that everything could be achieved with the help of confidence (xinxin 信心), perseverance (yili 毅力), and courage (yongqi 勇氣). In Zhengyan’s statement in particular, one can clearly make out the interconnection between religious and everyday meanings of the concept of “confidence.”

While the emphasis on xinxin (confidence) and zixin (self-confidence) is a particular life-theme of nuns*, it is by no means irrelevant for monks. For instance, when I asked a friend (who is a highly-educated Chinese monk) via WeChat what xinxin meant to him in order to verify my research results, he replied that xinxin was extraordinarily important in Buddhism. Everybody was concerned with how to develop one’s confidence (xinxin 信心) in the Dharma (fofa 佛法); “faith” (xin 信) originally meant believing that the Dharma was true. Within the “Five Roots/Predispositions” (wugen 五根) of Buddhism, the “Root of Faith” (xin’gen 信根) was the most important. When I asked him if he would translate the term xinxin into “faith” or “confidence,” and whether it also included a sense of self-confidence (dui ziji de xinxin 對自己的信心), i.e., that somebody is confident that they are able to attain Buddhahood by consistently and steadfastly practicing without giving up, no matter how difficult that was going to be, he replied:

As you said, xin 信 actually contains two parts. One is confidence (xinxin 信心) in the outward “Dharma” (fa 法), in the Three Jewels, the Four Noble Truths, and the Thirty-Seven Factors of Enlightenment (bodhi-pākṣita-dharmāh) and so on that Buddha taught, having deep and firm faith (shenxinbuyi 深信不疑) in them as methods of cultivation. Another part is deep and firm faith (shenxinbuyi 深信不疑) in oneself being able to become a Buddha by practicing these methods of cultivation. It is difficult to translate it into English, since it involves both of these meanings.

如您所說，信實際上包含了兩個部分，一部分是對外在”法”的信心，佛陀所說的三寶四諦三十七道品等一起法門(sic!) 深信不疑，一部分是對自己能通過這些法門修行成佛深信不疑。英語比較難以翻譯，因為兩種含義都存在. (WeChat protocol, 01.07.2017)

One should note that the monk did not distinguish between xin 信 (faith) and xinxin 信心 (confidence). When I asked him whether xin and xinxin originally had different meanings, he answered in the affirmative, citing some original sources. This indicates that, in some contexts, the interpretation of these terms differs from traditional discourses.

A further passage of the interview with the nun* Ef also confirms the view that xinxin also connotes being confident that one will attain enlightenment:

Ef: What is most important is that your confidence (xinxin 信心) must be steadfast (jianding 堅定) (laughing), […] your confidence must be steadfast.

I: Steadfast …

Ef: Exactly, steadfast without wavering. You mustn’t back down. If [your confidence] declines, [the lack of confidence] will increase until it diminishes, I mean vanishes, vanishes until it’s almost wiped out. But if you increase it slowly, your confidence will increase day by day, increase day by day. If you persist, if you always strive, always strive, you will slowly, um, if you make every effort, you will finally succeed. Um, but take your time, just go step by step; three feet of ice does not form in a single day! (laughing) Be patient.

Ef: 最重要的是信心要堅定(笑)[…] 就是信心要堅定.

I: 堅定.

Ef: 嗯，堅定不移動，不要打退堂鼓。如果退失的話，它就會慢慢蔓延就會退失，就是消失，消失殆盡了，但是如果慢慢增上的話，一天增一點信心，一天增一點信心，一直都是堅定的，一直都是加油加油就是滿滿的，嗯就充足了馬力，就到達了那個目的。嗯，要慢慢來，日子是一天一天過的，冰凍三尺，非一日之寒 (笑) 。慢慢來. (Ef 1:21:35–1:22:29)

For this nun*, xinxin is something that one is able to learn, that can be accumulated day by day with persistence and great effort, something that gradually increases. What makes xinxin so important is that it is impossible to attain Buddhahood without it. It functions as self-encouragement not to give up one’s way of cultivation, not to give up the hope of being able to become a Buddha, even though this seems very hard and difficult, particularly for women. This process is comparable with climbing Mount Everest. At the beginning it appears impossible to succeed, but one has to be determined to reach the peak one day. In sum, xinxin means having the strength, willpower, steadfastness, determination, and persistence of a dazhangfu, while at the same time xinxin is a prerequisite of becoming a dazhangfu.

4 The Self-Confidence of Elite Nuns* within the Discourse about the Future of Buddhism in Mainland China

Self-confidence is also shown in the practice of the leaders of the elite nunnery in which I conducted my research. These leaders position themselves against scholar monks from the Buddhist academies, who they say behave “too freely,” i.e., not according to the monastic rules. For instance, when I asked about the role nuns* play within today’s Buddhist community in China, the abbess* answered:

Kf: Well, we … from our perspective, we just want to do our own business well, and that’s it. (laughing) We do well what we should do, and that’s it. If all nuns* managed to act according to the monastic rules, then monks might also … act according to the monastic rules more. (laughing, pause) What I’m trying to say is that if we nuns* demand of ourselves that we behave according to the monastic rules, then monks will also spur themselves on to behave more according to the monastic rules.

Kf: 呃，我們從自身來講，我們想把我們的事情做好，就好了(笑) 。把我們的該做的事情做好就好了。那如果比丘尼都能夠如法而行的話，那比丘師父他們，呃，也會更如法如行吧(笑, 停頓) 。 就是比丘尼我們自身要求我們 都如法而行， 那比丘師父，他們也會更策勵自己，更如法而行. (Kf 1:00:12–1:00:40)

The maxim of “concentrating on doing our own business well” is obviously very important for the abbess*, since she* mentioned it three times during our conversation. Although she* did not directly criticize the monks for not respecting monastic discipline, one can nevertheless pick out a mild dissatisfaction with the monks’ behavior, a sense of responsibility for the future development of Buddhism, and confidence in herself* that she* is taking the right approach. One can imagine that strictly observing all of the 348 rules for nuns* must be a challenge. If the nuns* do well, it might be something that they can be proud of, putting the monks (who have difficulties keeping even their 250 precepts) on the spot. Therefore, the elite nuns* from my study act as a kind of role model for the (male) Buddhist community in general, which has the function of guarding Buddhism’s orthodoxy (zhengfa 正法). They do not succeed by challenging the existing gender order of Buddhism as represented by the Eight Principal Rules (i.e., the Gurudharma) and the monastic discipline (Vinaya), but rather by embracing it and bringing it to exceptional perfection.

In line with this, when I asked the second master within the temple hierarchy what she* sees as the main responsibilities of nuns* in mainland China, she* replied:

Gf: Actually, during the Dharma Ending Age (mofa 末法), you will find now that nuns* gradually take up more space and do things more and more steadfastly. As for the tower of strength, nuns* obviously fulfill quite an important function. Because what you can see now in Buddhism overall is the difference in the performance of monks and nuns*. Men behave quite a bit too freely; they just do what they want without any restrictions. Aside from that, there are many monks from the Buddhist academies who are rather, I mean, those monk students are very hard to control. If you police them today, they won’t attend classes anymore …

I: (laughing)

Gf: (laughing) … they will run away and go to other schools. (laughing)

I: (laughing)

(laughing) As you see, in the worst case, they’ll not attend classes anymore but leave. So they’re very hard to control. They’re somehow very free and unrestrained. By contrast, nuns* are more

Gf: conscientious. Normally, in the academies for nuns*, the coming and going and this kind of restlessness, or all kind of being disobedient and leaving the classroom, all that happens very rarely. Nuns* are relatively conscientious and law-abiding. They spend all their energy on practice, on studying, on spreading the Dharma. They do it very steadfastly, and they keep on doing it patiently.

Gf: 其實末法年代的話呢，慢慢現在其實會發現比丘尼的這個佔領(sic!) 的這種做事更踏實一些。這個中流砥柱型的話呢，好像比丘尼起到的作用也蠻大的。因為現在的這個這種整個佛教能看到，男眾，呃，男眾相對來講跟女眾的表現的這種差异了。男生相對稍微就會比較，嗯，自由化，我想怎麼樣不受拘束啊。然後那個像很多男眾佛學院就比較，就說，這男眾是我們很難管，你今天管他他不上了，

I: (笑)

Gf: (笑) 跑到别的学校去上(笑).

I: (笑)

Gf: (笑) 你說他嚴重點的就不上了，就走了。然後就很難管。就是 … 比較自由，然後他也比較(吸氣)，嗯，就是(咂嘴) 不受約束化。相對女眾呢就是比較本分。嗯，一般像女眾佛學院的裡邊它像這種互相的來回這樣的走動性啊，或者說這種這種，呃，不聽話就出去啊怎麼樣，這種這種很少，相對比較本分比較安分一些。呃，致力於自己修行啊，呃，教學呀，弘法呀，踏踏實實做這一件事情，然後呢，比較耐煩(sic!) 的做下去. (Gf 1:05:34–1:06:57)

Although the term zixin (self-confidence) is not explicitly mentioned within the paragraph, one can nonetheless condense the text towards this message. It is easy to notice the abbess’s* high appraisal of the role of nuns* within the Buddhist community. She values self-discipline, persistence, and conscientiousness as these scholar nuns’* strengths. It is these strengths that help ensure Buddhism’s survival.

It is remarkable that the nun* leaders of the temple have created an alternative model of Buddhism that disengages from the dominant scholarly style of the monks’ academies. Indeed, it is nuns* who are all in all proportionally less educated than monks in contemporary China and who are therefore latently expected to maintain a strong confidence and follow the Pure Land path in compensation. Their heavy karmic burden as women legitimizes the idea that nuns* should strictly adhere to the Gurudharma and monastic rules in order to overcome all female weaknesses. The nuns* from my study actively adopt these role ascriptions as toolkits to build their own identity. They do so by combining erudition (as opposed to a lack of education) with devout faith and the strict observance of monastic discipline, and thereby preserve the orthodoxy and purity of Buddhism. Thus, what is covertly considered to be contradictory—namely scholarship and devout discipline—is deliberately and creatively combined. It is this combination that provides the basis for the identity and also the self-confidence of these scholar nuns*.

Furthermore, these nuns’* approach is in line with official Buddhist religious policy. Zhao Puchu 趙樸初 (1907–2000), president of the Chinese Buddhist Association from 1980 to 2000, propagated the unity between study and cultivation practice in the academies (xuexiu yitihua, xueseng shenghuo conglinhua 學修一體化，學僧生活叢林化), the preservation of orthodox faith and practice (zhengxin zhengxing 正信正行), and the strict observance of monastic rules.²⁶ Of course, the monks in the academies officially promote these guidelines as well. In addition, there are quite a few different understandings of how to preserve Buddhism’s orthodoxy. From the perspective of the scholar nuns* I interviewed, however, they consider it their responsibility to put Zhao Puchu’s principles into practice.

5 Conclusion

For many Buddhist nuns* in mainland China, xinxin (confidence) is essential for becoming a dazhangfu, a masculine hero with noble qualities. It is likely that the connection between confidence/faith and the characteristics of a dazhangfu is nothing new. For instance, Grant mentions Dharma heir Yunfu Daozhi 雲復道智 (dates unknown), who told one of his female* disciples, Lady Xia 夏, that as long as she* had forbearance and deep faith (ju yao dang ren shen xin 具要當忍深信), she* should not regret being born as a woman, since she* had the insight of a man (you nanzi zhi jian 有男子之見).²⁷ However, unlike studies based on the written sources from the past (which have been compiled by monks), this study proceeds from the perspective of present-day nuns* on an oral basis.

In this context, according to my research results, the interpretation of xinxin as also implying self-confidence marks the perspective of Buddhist nuns* themselves, who are confronted with the ascribed difficulties and weaknesses of women, which can lead to self-doubt. Nuns* regard xinxin as something which is particularly needed by women, who are at risk of abandoning their objective due to a lack of (self-)confidence. Thus, confidence serves to “masculinize” and strengthen one’s character. One cannot ignore the overlap with the modern Chinese national self-strengthening movement. As Wielander describes in this volume, the current political discourse led by Xi Jinping also highlights the importance of xinyang 信仰 (faith) and xinxin 信心 (confidence) for overcoming weakness. Furthermore, it is interesting to note that, within the early modernizing period at the beginning of the twentieth century in China, femininity was equated with weakness, backward traditions, and ethnic minorities, whereas masculinity stood for strength, modernity, and the Han population.²⁸ Therefore, as Kang Xiaofei puts it, “modernization was first and foremost a project to ‘masculinize the nation’ so that it could become strong enough to compete with the Western and Japanese imperialist powers (…).”²⁹ Consequently, there was consensus that China’s weakness had to be overcome by liberating and strengthening its female subjects.³⁰ Well might one ask whether Chinese Buddhist nuns* have inherited some of these thoughts.

The connection between xinxin and dazhangfu involves the endeavors, concerns, experiences of self-cultivation, living conditions, identities, and gender constructions of nuns*. The same applies to the dazhangfu’s combination of willpower, steadfastness, resolution, and determination—aptitudes which are considered to be naturally masculine within hegemonic Buddhist gender discourse. Again, nuns* need xinxin to transition to being a masculine hero in order to attain Buddhahood. Although monks also need to learn xinxin and act like a dazhangfu, there is nonetheless a distinct gender transition when regarding xinxin in the discourse of Buddhist nuns* in China.

In addition to the level of personal cultivation, there is also a broader context concerning the temple leadership and their role in the discourse about the future of Buddhism in mainland China. From the perspective of these elite nuns*, erudition must be combined with orthodox faith and strict observance of the monastic rules. These concepts are traditionally understood as contradictory and, from the leading nuns’* perspective, insufficiently implemented within the main hubs of Buddhist activity in China, i.e., the Buddhist academies for monks. Although the principle of unifying study with orthodox faith and self-cultivation has been part of the official religious policy since Zhao Puchu, the scholar nuns* of my study regard themselves as the true preservers of this postulate by strictly putting it into practice. To that end, they embrace traditional gender role expectations, for instance by observing the Gurudharma and Vinaya as an answer to women’s negative character traits and by having strong confidence, which is considered to be appropriate for women. At the same time, however, they broaden their scope by serving as role models for the whole Buddhist community. Their strategy consists of dedicating themselves to higher education while simultaneously preserving Buddhism’s orthodoxy via devout faith and self-disciplined practice. By ensuring the survival of Buddhism as a self-set goal, they clearly demonstrate self-confidence.